I was so zen and peaceful and
BE STILL AND KNOW THAT I AM GOD
O COME O COME EMMANUEL
PREPARE HIM ROOM
and now I’m
what do you get your teenage brother for Christmas and I still haven’t hung up that wreath and I’m not listening to enough Christmas music and another Christmas party and I haven’t sent out the Christmas cards and do I even want to send out Christmas cards and do I send my amazon presents directly to them or to me and I then I can wrap them myself and then ship them and I haven’t bought wrapping paper and how much should I spend on gifts and what do you even want for Christmas and Jack stop eating our Christmas tree.
And now I just stopped crying.
I left my laptop to stress cry.
A good 5 minutes on the bed.
But then the sun was shining on my face.
And The Son was in my thoughts.
And peace flooded in.
And I was able to stand up and put my boots on.
And I thought of the perfect gift for my brother.
And I allowed myself to feel and stress and feel and feel better without judging or shaming myself.
And now I feel shiny and new and known.
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