I feel discouraged. Isolated. My heart is breaking, is broken, is dying, has died.

I prayed for God to give me a dream with BJ in it last night. God didn’t answer my prayer with a yes.

And how I prayed that BJ would be healed. Would not die. God didn’t answer my prayers with a yes.

In fact, he keeps saying no.

Has anyone known more hurt than I?

More rejection? More pain? More prayers answered “no”?

Has anyone known more suffering? More hurt? More abandonment?

Oh I’m sure there have been many. Many who’ve known this suffering.

But how isolated I feel.

How sad.

How hopeless.

How scared.

But I cry to you for help, Lord;
in the morning my prayer comes before you.
Why, Lord, do you reject me and hide your face from me?


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  • Elizabeth Rondthaler Jolley

    Hang in there, sweet Andrea! Grief takes time, and time takes time. You can’t condense it, you just have to live it, every day. Your grief is a part of your love, and it is clear how much you value love.

    • Andrea Enright

      Thank you for the constant encouragement and love, Elizabeth. <3