Category Archives: Honesty

  I once asked a group of friends why no one ever asked about BJ. This was back when it was so fresh— maybe three months. A candid conversation about grief came up and so I asked. Why doesn’t anyone ask me about BJ? I was curious– not trying to judge but just wanting to […]

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This photo was taken one year ago– exactly one year ago when I had BJ and we went on a morning walk and dreamt of babies and a trip to Ireland. One year ago when he decided to make an Irish feast and prepped and shopped and cooked an epic corned beef and cabbage dinner […]

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    I am an entirely different person. When I look back on 2015 I think who was that woman? Who was this person that encountered the greatest storm life could give her? I often think about that first day of school on September 8, 2015. It had been only 10 weeks since the sudden […]

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  How am I? I’m okay. Thanksgiving was hard. The week after my birthday was hard. Sundays are hard. But Christmas was nice. It was good. I was okay. I felt love and Christmas magic. I felt Jesus. But reality has certainly settled in. He’s really gone and I’m really single and I am doubting […]

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    I keep seeing nativities everywhere. And they’re all gorgeous and I love them but I’m also pissed off. Because they’re always so perfect. Too perfect. It’s as if they seem to forget you have to be PREGNANT to have a baby. Why is Mary skinny? I want a big ol’ pregnant Mary. And […]

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